Blood

A little something today, but nothing tomorrow.
Strength for a moment but weakened slowly.

A great beginning yet ending in a sad memory.

I believe in you.
You said you wouldn’t forsake me.
Have you broken your promise?

I am alone, Lord! Do you even care?
Moving on is so hard and my strength is fading.
I am limp in your hands, my eyes empty and unseeing.
Do something, Lord!

I cry myself to sleep, but never go so deep.
Nightmares fill the atmosphere throughout the whole night.

Demons are my only companions.
They love nothing more than to destroy me slowly.
They are the only whispers in my head…
Voices that feel like home…
Do I know anything else?
Is there any other way?

You’ve never failed me before, so why do I feel betrayed?

Quickly, drain my blood, Lord, and take it away.
Gather the broken pieces of my soul, each heavy with pain.
They’re all that’s left.
All that’s left of me.

Lord, it’s hard to live when I’m dead inside – and it’s getting harder to breathe when I’m not alive.
The road is becoming wide and I’m scared, Lord.
Don’t reject me or forsake me.
Give me a new beginning.
I want to be filled to overflowing – bring light into my soul.
I am undeserving and turn my face away in shame. But I have nowhere else to go.
Erase the black pages of my history and become my joy and my life.
With every breath I breathe, you remind me of your love so unconditional.
I am filled with a fire, God, as you are the wings for my flight and the foundation I stand upon.

Is this a dream?
I looked up and there you were, covered with my filth and despair.
I cried out, reaching forward, and realized I was shining white.

I was made new & whole.

My gaze found yours.

“Beloved,” your smile stirred something deep inside me. “Do not worry, for your sins are as far as the east is from the west.”

The joy, the fire, the tears of joy all roused within me.
You’ve never stopped caring when all along I’ve pushed you away.
You’ve always loved me more than he on Earth could ever love his own child.
More than I could love myself.

In the midst of my pursuit of pleasures, emptiness was left to consume me.
Through all the lies I’ve worshipped, you’re the one truth I have found.
I will stay forever in your arms, secure and safe.

I will not break.
Lord, help me, I will not stray.
Your blood flowed for me so that I may be free.

I will not break, for your blood flowed to set me free.